PokerStars is a complete joke. The hands are not delt randomly, but rather strategically. I usually play other poker rooms because I realized this long ago. Today, I think I proved it. After a long absense, I started playing PokerStars again about 2 days ago. I play big tournaments with 45 players. The first 3 tournaments, I was winning 2 or 3 showdowns in the entire tournament and rarely getting a pair, never mind a set, straight or flush. I'd usually finish in the top two tables, sometimes the last table. Today, I was on the last table and had to leave. I decided to go all-in every hand and hope I can eliminate a couple players before I go broke. I won about 19 of the next 20 hands and the tournament. It seems, if you play completely stupid poker, you will get the cards in PokerStars. I think it's a behavioral algorithm to encourage bad players to convert to real money tables. What a joke!

SMART ASS ANSWER #6
   It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline.
   'Would you like dinner?' the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
   'What are my choices?' John asked.
   'Yes or no,' she replied.

SMART ASS ANSWER #5
    A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
    As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
    Without missing a beat, she said, 'Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub.'

SMART ASS ANSWER #4
   A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store
   but she couldn't find one big enough for her family.
   She asked a stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any bigger?'
   The stock boy replied, 'No ma'am, they're dead.'

SMART ASS ANSWER #3
  The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window.
  'I've been waiting for you all day,' the cop said.
  The kid replied, 'Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.'
  When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

SMART ASS ANSWER #2
  A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, ' Low Bridge Ahead.'
  Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge.
  Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up.
  The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says,
  'Got stuck, huh?'
  The truck driver says, 'No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.'

SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2007
   A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.
   She says 'Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow.
   I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!'
   A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked,  
   'What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?'
   The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering.
   When silence is restored, the teacher smiles at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says,
   'Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand.'

Sometimes, I get my best laughs when I'm answering end-user support questions. Today, I got a series of emails from an end-user who was either inebriated or just plain stupid.

• At 1:22, I got an email asking how much was the membership and if it had such a privilege.
• At 1:37, before I answered their questions, I got a PayPal membership payment from this person.
• At 7:59, I fired off an email instructing them to create a password.
• At 8:17, they responded to my instructional email that they cannot login.
• At 8:26, I respond that they have to create a password first.
• At 8:39, they respond that after creating the password, they were forward to a particular webpage, but that they wanted to go to another webpage.
• At 8:43, I respond that they could go to that webpage by clicking on the link.
• At 8:51, they respond "Why am I asking the same question over and over?"
• At 9:02, I considered answering their question with "Because you are blond", but resisted.

First as an Apple commercial and now as a music video, I love this song. Apple can pick 'em.

My friend Jason Schramm informed me yesterday that Amazon is trying to strong-arm his kindlereport.com website from him. WTF? These BigCo's need to find out that we aren't putting up with their shit no more. Jason was using this website to promote Amazon's product. I've decided that until Amazon apologizes, I'm no longer adding new Amazon product links to any of my dozen+ websites. I'm also gonna remove all links from the existing sites as new versions are released. I'm also asking everybody to reblog this shit and tell Amazon to stick it where the sun don't shine. If we work together and affect Amazon's bottom line, then BigCo's will think twice in the future.

http://www.kindlereport.com/news/amazon-tries-to-strong-arm-kindle-news-sites.html

Dave Winer says "More people live in California than live in Canada. 1/3 of the people are Hispanic." I disagree. Most people in California exists, but don't live.

http://twitter.com/davewiner/statuses/668501272